There it is again.” I muttered to myself, frustrated as I washed my arm.
Every morning for five or six days in the fall of 2003, I noticed rust-colored sticky stuff appearing on my left forearm and thigh. Finally, to my shock and horror, I discovered that the rust-colored sticky stuff was easily dripping from my left nipple. In disbelief, I collapsed into my bedroom chair, swirling with a mix of grief and fear. I stared at the blank white wall, feeling vacant, distant, disconnected from what I´d just seen. I called my doctor and was told this was not an emergency, but did need immediate attention. It could be cancer.
After an exam, the breast cancer specialist made an appointment for a mammogram and ultrasound. They took two sets of two x-rays on each breast and a third x-ray of a specific area of my right breast. In the ultrasound I could see the area of my right breast where they’d done the extra mammogram. There was a dark mass. After the biopsy on my right breast, I was diagnosed with infiltrating ductile carcinoma, a rare, aggressive, deadly cancer that metastasize to the bones and lungs. Next is death. I had symptoms of both bone and lung cancer.
The ultrasound of my left breast showed a trail of little beads, masses from my underarm to my nipple. “This couldn’t be good,” I thought. These masses rubbed against the ducts, causing bleeding and discharge. That was the rust-colored sticky stuff. My left breast was diagnosed with a rare duct disease. My oncologist felt that I also had cancer in this breast. She was deeply concerned, and wanted to immediately remove the mass in my right breast and cut off 1/3 or more of my left breast.
Even before these diagnoses, I had already decided that I didn’t want surgery. In my heart, I really didn’t believe I would live through a surgery. I preferred an alternative approach. I wanted a fix, not just a partial solution. I chose Mye-Cell treatments in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico and worked with Dr. Melenie Dunn, NMD in Scottsdale, AZ. I am now cancer-free.
I have the confirmed belief that each of life’s moments hold a purpose and a gift. I don’t always remember to live by these beliefs, but I do always come back to them. I knew that this particular experience with cancer was about trust. It was about my ability to trust in myself and in God. The lesson was about realizing, knowing with every breath and every beat of my heart, that I Am Blessed. We All Are.
Doreene Clement, a cancer victor and author of The 5 Year Journal, Journal daily in minutes a day. She is currently writing a new book and movie, Blessed, about her life and her cancer experience. For more information www.the5yearjournal.com 480.423.8095 Copyright 2005 OMDC, LLC All Rights Reserved
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